Net Zero Campaigners “Shocked And Appalled” Public Don’t Want To Be Poorer, Colder And Hungrier
“Until people stop eating, staying warm or driving to work, humanity is doomed!”
Dog Owners Encouraged To Use Gender-Neutral Pronouns For Pets
“Here, boy,” and “man’s best friend” deemed “outdated stereotypes” by pet inclusivity activists.
Extinction Rebellion Protest Carrie Johnson’s Womb
“Children cause climate change, and Carrie is simply having too many”.
Gavin Newsom Feeding Off Biden’s Remaining Life Force
“As Biden grows weaker, Newsom grows stronger. Literally. He is feeding off his soul” – White House spokesman.
World’s Hottest-Ever Temperature Recorded At Erupting Volcano “Proof Of Climate Change”
“The lava wasn’t to blame – fossil fuel emissions were,” claims WEF scientist.
“Cheers, Queers!” London Pub “Will Only Hire LGBTQ+ Staff”
“It’s important for diversity that we ban straight applicants,” says landlord Ben Doon.
Gary Lineker’s Fury As British Airways Seats Him “On The Right Wing”
“I reject the Right Wing in all its guises. Even in my First Class private suite”
New “Fart Tax” For Red Meat Eaters Touted By Climate Change Czar
“Anal emissions from carnivores” identified as “key driver” of climate change.
Girl, 14, Identifies As Head Teacher And Sacks All LGBTQ+ Activist Teachers
“It was time to get some adults back in the room,” says Rosie Brown.
Climate Protesters Call For A Stop To All Coal, Oil And Nuclear Energy. Demand UK Grid To Be Run Entirely On ‘Girl Power’
A group of climate protesters has called for a complete cessation of coal, oil, and nuclear energy...