Climate scientists have unveiled a revolutionary engine that runs on hypocrisy, and it’s set to be fuelled by the colossal emissions generated at the next climate conference. COP28, hosted in an oil-rich country and attended by approximately 400,000 delegates arriving in style on private jets, is anticipated to power the world for years to come.
“This is a game-changer,” declared Dr. Green Irony, lead scientist on the project. “We’ve discovered that the sheer hypocrisy generated at these climate conferences has an energy potential greater than all the hot air emitted during the meetings.”
The engine, aptly named the “Hypocri-Motor,” harnesses the contradictions between climate rhetoric and the lavish carbon footprints of those attending conferences. It’s fueled by the cognitive dissonance generated when delegates call for carbon reduction while indulging in luxury travel and accommodations.
“We realized that the energy potential of saying one thing and doing another is practically limitless,” explained Dr. Irony. “As long as climate conferences continue to be held in oil-rich paradises with delegates arriving in fleets of private jets, we’ll have a perpetual energy source.”
Critics argue that the invention is just another example of the absurdity surrounding climate conferences, where the talk of sustainability often clashes with the extravagant practices of the attendees.
“Who needs solar panels and wind turbines when we can power the world with hypocrisy?” mused one skeptic. “It’s a renewable resource as long as people keep saying one thing and doing another.”
As COP28 kicks off with a parade of private planes and luxury accommodations, the world watches in awe as the Hypocri-Motor begins to hum with the energy of contradictions, proving once again that in the world of climate conferences, actions speak louder than words—except when those actions are boarding a private jet.