In a surprising turn of events, the beloved and controversial Drag Queen Story Time program has been forced to shut its curtains after the government enacted a new law prohibiting adults from engaging in stripteases in the presence of innocent children.

The once-thriving event, where drag queens would entertain young audiences with colorful stories and extravagant performances, faced its demise due to a sudden crackdown on adult-themed activities occurring in child-friendly environments.

“We’re devastated to announce the closure of Drag Queen Story Time,” lamented Sparkle Divine, the renowned drag queen who led the storytelling sessions. “Our goal was to inspire children’s imaginations and promote inclusivity, but apparently, some folks took issue with the occasional feather boa and glittery shimmy.”

While supporters of the program hailed it as a celebration of diversity and acceptance, critics argued that the presence of adult entertainers in front of impressionable children was inappropriate.

“The government’s decision is a victory for common sense,” declared concerned parent Karen Smithson. “Children deserve a safe and wholesome environment where their innocence can be preserved. Drag Queen Story Time blurred that line between entertainment and adult-oriented performances.”

The closure of Drag Queen Story Time has sparked intense debate across the nation. Advocates for the program argue that it provided a platform for positive role models and challenged traditional gender norms, while opponents claim it exposed children to themes and concepts beyond their age range.

“I can’t believe they’re shutting us down,” expressed Ruby Stardust, another prominent drag queen storyteller. “We just wanted to spread love, laughter, and fabulousness to the next generation. Who knew a few sequins could cause such an uproar?”

With the curtains drawn on Drag Queen Story Time, some organizers are exploring alternative avenues to continue their mission of promoting acceptance and diversity. Ideas such as virtual storytelling sessions and age-restricted events have been floated, although their feasibility remains uncertain.

As the controversy rages on, the fate of Drag Queen Story Time serves as a reminder of the ongoing clash between progressive values and traditional sensibilities in modern society. For now, children will have to find their stories and life lessons from less flamboyant sources, at least until a new chapter can be written in this colourful saga.