Local man John Smith was thrilled to discover that his mild Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) allowed him to claim some identitarian victim points.

“I’ve always felt left out of the conversation when it comes to diversity and victimhood,” Smith exclaimed. “But now, with my ADHD diagnosis, I finally have a chance to claim some oppression points of my own!”

Smith, a straight white male, had previously felt excluded from conversations about diversity and inclusivity. But with his newfound identity as an ADHD-afflicted person, he is confident that he will be able to join the ranks of other marginalized groups.

“I can’t wait to join the next protest or march for my fellow ADHD sufferers,” Smith said. “We may not have it as bad as some other groups, but we still deserve to be heard and taken seriously.”

Smith’s announcement was met with mixed reactions from those around him. While some praised him for embracing his identity and standing up for himself, others criticized him for trying to claim victimhood status where it was not warranted.

Despite the criticism, Smith remains determined to fight for his place among the oppressed.

“I know I may not have it as bad as some other groups,” he said. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t deserve a seat at the table.”

And with that, Smith took up his banner of ADHD victimhood and marched boldly into the fray of identity politics, ready to fight for his place in the hierarchy of victimhood.