Keir Starmer, the leader of the Labour Party, made a bold statement by donning a hat adorned with the colors of the European Union flag. While many observers raised their eyebrows at this sartorial choice, Starmer was quick to assure the public that he’s “definitely not a Rejoiner in disguise.”
With a straight face and his EU-themed headgear proudly perched atop his well-coiffed hair, Starmer addressed the media outside his office. “Let me be absolutely clear,” he began, a phrase often used when politicians are about to be anything but clear. “This hat is just a hat. It doesn’t mean anything. It’s not a secret signal to my fellow Rejoiners or a subtle nod to our European friends.”
Despite his assurances, some couldn’t help but wonder if this bold fashion statement was more than just a fashion statement. After all, it’s not every day you see a British politician proudly sporting the colors of an entity the UK officially left not too long ago.
Starmer continued, “I believe in the UK’s decision to leave the EU, and I fully support our newfound sovereignty. This hat is simply a fashion choice, nothing more, nothing less. Besides, it matches my tie quite nicely, don’t you think?”
As reporters tried to dig deeper, asking if this was an attempt to court the pro-EU vote, Starmer deftly sidestepped the question. “Look, I’ve always been a fan of colorful headwear. Remember that time I wore a Union Jack bowler hat? That doesn’t mean I’m secretly a monarchist, does it?”
The political world may never know for sure whether Keir Starmer’s EU-colored hat is a statement of his true beliefs or just a quirky fashion choice. But one thing is certain: it certainly adds a splash of colour to the often dull world of British politics.