A coalition of outspoken celebrities has come together to demand the immediate return of face masks, citing reasons ranging from personal comfort to concerns about the looming threat of rogue pollen. Among the notable names leading the charge are the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of Oz, Piglet from Winnie the Pooh, and Walter the Softy from the Beano comics. Their impassioned plea for a return to facial anonymity has left the world both bewildered and amused.

The Cowardly Lion, famous for his unwavering courage once he had a medal, declared, “If I can face down the Wicked Witch of the West, I should at least have the option to hide my nose when I’m feeling bashful.”

Piglet, the lovable resident of the Hundred Acre Wood, chimed in with his concerns about the potential resurgence of hay fever. “Oh d-d-dear,” he stuttered nervously. “It’s j-j-just safer if we all keep our faces covered. W-what if the pollen attacks?”

Walter the Softy, known for his eternal rivalry with Dennis the Menace, grumbled, “It’s high time we brought back face masks. Can’t be too careful, you know. Those menacing children are everywhere, and who knows what they might be carrying!”

The celebrity coalition’s demands have left many scratching their heads. While their motives may be questionable, their commitment to facial obscurity is unwavering. Some have suggested that they might be onto something, given the ongoing uncertainties of the world. After all, if the Cowardly Lion can find the courage to demand a return to masks, maybe we should all take a moment to reconsider our own comfort zones, however peculiar they may be.