Disney has announced a groundbreaking remake of the classic “Beauty and the Beast,” aptly titled “Beauty and The Beauty.” This new adaptation is set to flip the script on conventional storytelling, putting a spotlight on the timeless struggle of a stunningly gorgeous protagonist seeking to find true love amidst a kingdom teeming with other equally stunningly gorgeous characters.

In a press release that left critics and fans alike scratching their heads, Disney declared, “We heard the demands for more realistic portrayals in our films, and we thought, ‘Why not deliver what the people really want?’ So, get ready for a tale as old as time, where everyone’s impossibly good-looking and body positivity means that every character is so ridiculously attractive, they make Greek gods look like regular Joes.”

The lead character, a charming prince turned into a beast by an enchantress, now grapples with the real challenge of coming to terms with his rugged handsomeness. Gaston, the dashing villain known for his brawny physique, will be portrayed as a misunderstood intellectual who spends his days pondering the nature of existence and the intricacies of fine art.

“We wanted to challenge beauty norms in a way that no one saw coming,” a Disney spokesperson commented with a knowing smirk. “We’re breaking down barriers, one symmetrical face at a time.”

Critics are already buzzing about the bold move, praising Disney’s willingness to flip the script and confront societal expectations head-on. After all, what better way to foster self-esteem and body positivity than by showcasing a kingdom filled with people who wake up every day looking like they just walked off the cover of a fashion magazine?

As “Beauty and The Beauty” promises to turn the fairy tale genre on its perfectly coiffed head, one thing is clear: Disney has officially shattered the glass mirror, leaving only flawless reflections in its wake.