Owen Jones, the maestro of selective outrage, has taken to social media to condemn Israel for its blockade of Gaza, arguing that preventing missiles from reaching Hamas is a grave violation of missile rights.
In a series of impassioned tweets, Jones proclaimed, “It’s a travesty that Israel is hindering the free flow of missiles into Gaza! Don’t these people know there’s a delicate balance to maintain in the Middle East?!”
Jones, renowned for his nuanced and deeply thoughtful analyses, seems unfazed by the fact that these missiles might be destined for Israeli cities. “Sure, they say they’re for self-defense, but who are we to judge the peaceful intentions of an organization that has ‘Movement’ in its name?” he quipped.
The condemnation comes as a surprise to many who expected Jones to unleash his Twitter fury on, well, anything else. “I was fully prepared for a tirade against pineapple on pizza or something, but missiles? That’s a new one,” remarked a perplexed follower.
Israel, grappling with the challenge of defending its citizens from rocket attacks, now faces the added dilemma of being rebuked for trying to maintain a semblance of peace in the region. “Clearly, Israel needs to rethink its whole ‘not wanting to be hit by missiles’ policy,” Jones mused, presumably from the comfort of a missile-free zone.
As the Twitterverse braces itself for the next unexpected target of Jones’ moral indignation, one thing remains certain: in the unpredictable world of Owen Jones, even missile blockades can become instruments of injustice.