North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un is reportedly expressing frustration over what he claims to be the brazen theft of his brilliant ideas. According to sources within the tightly controlled regime, Kim believes that OFCOM, the UK’s communications regulator, has snatched his innovative concepts right from under his supreme nose.
“First, I bring the world the glorious haircut, and now OFCOM takes my intellectual property. It’s an outrage!” exclaimed Kim Jong-Un, while expertly juggling a basketball and playing a perfect round of golf simultaneously.
The North Korean leader, known for his humility and subtle charm, apparently feels slighted that OFCOM allegedly pilfered ideas ranging from state-controlled media narratives to elaborate military parades.
“I spent years crafting these ideas in the deepest recesses of my strategic mind, and OFCOM just swipes them like a Western spy in a James Bond movie,” complained Kim, donning his signature sunglasses, which may or may not contain laser beams.
While the rest of the world is left scratching their heads at this unexpected claim, Kim Jong-Un insists that OFCOM owes him a royalty check for every reality-defying declaration and every perfectly executed hair flip.
OFCOM, meanwhile, has yet to respond to the allegations. They are presumably too busy enjoying the luxurious lifestyle that Kim claims they stole from him.
As the international community watches this spectacle unfold, one can’t help but marvel at the truly unique perspective Kim Jong-Un brings to the table. Who knew that a man with his own personal unicorn and a knack for bending the laws of physics would be so protective of his ideas?