A recent study has shockingly confirmed what many Londoners suspected all along. The correlation is undeniable: every time Mayor Sadiq Khan’s policies take a nosedive, he miraculously finds himself on a jet to some exotic climate change conference.
The study, conducted by the Institute of Highly Questionable Statistics (IHQS), relied on sophisticated algorithms such as ‘Connect-the-Dots’ and ‘Pin-the-Tail-on-the-Politician.’ The findings suggest a direct link between the Mayor’s policy failures and his sudden penchant for jet-setting around the globe, presumably to gather inspiration on how to combat climate change from countries with significantly less frequent drizzles.
“We were amazed at the clarity of the pattern,” said Dr. Ima Kidding, lead researcher at IHQS. “It’s almost like clockwork. The worse things get in London, the more convinced the Mayor becomes that he needs to attend a climate summit in Bali.”
Critics argue that this revelation sheds light on a previously unnoticed coping mechanism employed by politicians. “It’s textbook diversion,” said political analyst Jane Doe. “Your housing policies are failing? Quick, book a first-class ticket to a tropical paradise and drop a few buzzwords about carbon footprints!”
The Mayor’s office has vehemently denied any intentional correlation between policy mishaps and international jaunts, stating, “These are mere coincidences. The Mayor is just very committed to tackling climate change globally, especially when he’s not needed in City Hall.”
As Londoners brace themselves for the next round of policy struggles, one thing seems certain: Sadiq Khan will be honing his climate change rhetoric on a beach somewhere, likely blissfully unaware of the storm he’s left behind.
