President Joe Biden addressed a crowd today, assuring them that he can’t recall a single instance when his memory let him down. The statement came during a speech that was, ironically, centered around the importance of transparent leadership and accountability.

“I’ve got the best memory, believe me. It’s a tremendous memory. People are always telling me how amazing my memory is,” Biden declared, his eyes narrowing in an apparent effort to search his own mind.

The crowd, a mix of supporters and skeptics, exchanged bewildered glances as Biden continued to recount anecdotes from his decades-long political career, conveniently omitting any instances of forgetfulness or verbal blunders.

“I remember the first time I… um, well, I can’t remember the specifics, but it was a very memorable moment, let me tell you,” Biden stumbled, only to quickly regain his composure and reassure the audience that it was just a minor hiccup.

Critics argue that Biden’s assertion flies in the face of numerous instances where he appeared to lose his train of thought, confused various details, or made statements that seemed, at best, disconnected from reality.

However, the President pressed on, asserting that he’s the epitome of mental acuity. “You know, folks, my memory is so sharp, it puts the edge on a Ginsu knife. Remember those commercials? They were great.”

As the speech concluded, many in the audience were left wondering if the President’s memory was truly as infallible as he claimed or if, just maybe, someone might need to jog his memory about the times he may have, well, forgotten something.