Former Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has unveiled a bold plan: the mass deportation of all British Jews. The unexpected proposal has left many scratching their heads, wondering if Corbyn’s solution might be more drastic than the problem it seeks to address.

Corbyn, known for his passionate stances on various issues, believes that removing every British Jew from the equation will miraculously eliminate any potential for antisemitic sentiment. In a press conference, he boldly proclaimed, “No Jews, no bigotry. It’s simple logic.”

The plan seems to hinge on the assumption that antisemitism is an intrinsic trait of British Jews, and by shipping them off, the nation will transform into a utopia of tolerance and understanding. Corbyn’s proposal includes providing each departing Jew with a one-way ticket to a yet-to-be-decided location, where they can, presumably, reflect on their potential for antisemitic behaviour.

Critics argue that the plan is not only impractical but fundamentally flawed in its understanding of antisemitism. “It’s like trying to cure a headache by chopping off your head,” remarked a political commentator.

As news of Corbyn’s proposal spread, reactions ranged from confusion to amusement. Memes depicting Corbyn as the ultimate ‘antisemitism-buster’ started circulating on social media, with some suggesting that perhaps a more nuanced approach to education and awareness might be in order.

While the former Labour leader remains steadfast in his vision for an antisemitism-free Britain, the logistics of implementing such a plan have yet to be addressed. As the nation grapples with the implications, one can’t help but wonder if Corbyn’s next proposal might involve eliminating all umbrellas to end rainy days once and for all.